Sonnet

I woke today and saw that right outside,

That from the sky the sun had gone away.

The clouds now knew my mood and thus they cried,

I fear I might not ever see the day.

The only thing I know is just to pray.

I cannot see a ray of light from here,

I wish I knew what I could even say.

It really seems impossible to cheer,

The rain will never stop is what I fear.

I try to fix the mess this has become,

It does not help; I cannot see the clear.

I feel always perpetually glum.

I fear to speak but always do I dream,

That finally one day the sun will gleam.

You'll never guess.

"But for me it's better to keep

all my flaws and thoughts locked

up safe, where the only person

who can judge me is

myself."

You'll never guess where

this quote comes from ;)

Wild at Heart.

"That rebel moon is shinin'

Those stars burn like diamonds

Hell bent on chasin' down that crazy slide

I'll follow you where you're leading

To the first sweet taste of freedom

You got me runnin' baby

Wild at heart"

Gloriana + the beach + friends and family = <3

I think this speaks for itself..

What do you think? ;)

The Nightmare.

Video by me and my sisters. Watch it. Your life will never be the same ;)

I'm only me when I'm with you.

I love my sister,

and Taylor Swift is the best <3

Along For the Ride giveaway

For those interested, there's an Along For the Ride giveaway here. The contest ends on June 26. Go check it out!

Video for Along For the Ride

This is a cool video that Sarah Dessen had on her blog. It's promoting her new book Along For the Ride which is on sale June 16. Enjoy!

Find more videos like this on Sarah-land

Wintergirls

by Laurie Halse Anderson

"Dead girl walking," the boys say in the halls.

"Tell us your secret," the girls whisper, one toilet to another.

I am that girl.

I am the space between my thighs, daylight shining through.

I am the bones they want, wired on a porcelain frame.

Wow. wow. wow. This book was stunning and intense. It's the kind of book that you have to put down for a while before you continue reading. It was almost frightening at times to be inside Lia's head. To hear herself rationalize what she was doing. There was one line that she said over and over to herself that just shocked me,

"::Stupid/ugly/stupid/bitch/stupid/fat/

stupid/baby/stupid/loser/stupid/lost::"

This book was so real. So many girls see themselves this way and so they cut and starve their bodies. Lia never saw herself as anorexic, she saw herself as strong. Throughout the book you see examples of her controlling her thoughts around food; telling herself that she doesn't need that muffin, or that pizza makes her gag. I don't know how the author pulled this book off. It was amazing and scary at the same time. Everything about this book is so brilliant. This is, so far, my favorite book from 2009.

Waiting For You

by Susane Colasanti

I don't even know how to give a synopsis of this book without making it sound SO shallow and cheesy. But it's not. If you decide to read this book, do me a favor and don't read the synopsis that comes with it. It will make you want to throw the book in the trash. Trust me. So instead of trying to tell you the plot, I'm going to describe the way I felt about the book. 

This book is about a boy and a girl (of course) but it's also so much more than that. It's about how everyone is always waiting for something. We're waiting to grow up, waiting to find true love, waiting to discover our purpose in life. Teens especially are always waiting for things to change. This book grasps that so well. The writing is not brilliant, but the story is truly thought prevoking. It's about a girl who is struggling with an anxiety disorder. She over analyzes everything that goes on in her life and at school, and it drives her crazy. She creates this image in her mind of the "perfect guy" that she thinks she wants to be with, when in reality he's not the guy she thought she knew. I loved how the family seemed completely normal for the first half of the book, but then the parents got a divorce and ruined it. Overall this book is a very easy read, and completely worth it. You just have to be willing to look beyond the high school drama and dig for the good stuff, and I promise you it's there. 

Quote and Picture.

                                                                

"So I just decided to relax into it, 

bumpy and crazy as it might be,

and try for once to just go...

Along For the Ride."

-Sarah Dessen.

Laurie Halse Anderson Book Signing!

I had the amazing opportunity to see THE Laurie Halse Anderson at Quail Ridge Books in Raleigh, North Carolina! I went with a bunch of my friends; and you probably know two of them, Emily and Traci (also fellow bloggers). This was one of the best nights of my life. She spoke about her new book, Wintergirls, and then went on to talk about anything and everything! She spoke a lot about anorexia, seeing as how that's what the book is all about. It really opened my eyes to how serious this illness really is. She was so authentic when she spoke. There was no fluff, she just says it like it is and it's all real. I love that.

She then went on to give advice to aspiring authors. She

 answered many questions and everything she said was so inspiring. It's hard, having dreams, especially when they seem SO out of reach. But her advice really made me feel confident in my dreams and made me want to pursue them. (I know that sounds REALLY cheesy, but it's very true) Thankfully we taped it, and her powerful words will stay with me for a very long time.

Emily and I before the event.

Traci and I before LHA spoke!

Here's a picture of me with LHA herself. I got a signed copy of her book *squee!*

Here's a video that Emily and I made. We were feeling random and bored while we were waiting. We have another video of LHA speaking, and so I'll upload that soon. Enjoy! (P.S. I talk too much, sorry!)

The Patron Saint of Butterflies

by Cecilia Galante

Agnes and Honey have been best friends their whole lives, yet they could not be more different. They live in a religious commune called Mount Blessing. Agnes diligently seeks the life of a saint, while Honey wants nothing to do with that life. Their friendship is put to the test when Honey questions the commune and it's leader, Emmanuel. When Agnes' grandmother Nana Pete comes for a visit, she discovers the commune's most horrible secret. Fearing for their safety, she takes the girls and leaves Mount Blessing. Agnes struggles to cling to the life she once had, and Honey tries to bring out the friend she used to have in Agnes. Only when the biggest lie is uncovered does Agnes finally realize that she has the courage to create her own future.

Wow, just..wow. I read The Patron Saint of Butterflies because it was on Miss Erin's  Top Favorites of 2008. I don't think I have ever been so involved in a story before. This book was so interactive, which I loved. The writing was incredible and basically lept off the page. The kind of writing that pulls me into the story for days. While reading this story I felt trapped and suffocated. I saw how these people were living and I knew how warped their thinking was. I just kept wanting to yell at them and tell them how insane they are for following Emmanuel. I felt so many different emotions that I just couldn't contain. It was brilliant. It felt more like an experience than something I was reading.

This book was completely wonderful. It's definitely one of my absolute favorites.

Paper Towns

by John Green

Quinten Jacobsen has been in love with Margo Roth Spiegelman since the day she moved next door to him. They were young friends that grew apart as they entered middle and high school. Quinten admires Margo from afar and distantly remains in love with this mysterious, and adventurous girl that he once knew. Quinten is surprised when one night, Margo climbs into his room through the window dressed like a ninja. She asks him to accompany her as she seeks revenge, and of course Quinten reluctantly follows her. The next morning, "Q" is surprised to find that Margo has mysteriously disappeared. He discovers clues that could lead to Margo, and those clues are meant for him.

I was surprised when I read Paper Towns, in many ways. The beginning was not as boring as I thought it was going to be. It was a very easy read, but it was also very gripping and interesting. I couldn't put it down. Especially the second half of the book, when you start learning more and more about the real Margo. There were some things that bothered me though. There was a lot of crude humor that I found annoying, and there was a decent amount of language throughout the book. But looking past all that, it was such a compelling story that I would definitely recommend to anyone!

3 Willows

by Ann Brashares

I have read all four of The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants books. The writing never amazed me, but the stories were always intriguing. I loved the idea of four best friends united by a magical pair a pants. I was basically obsessed with these books. So when I saw that Ann Brashares had started a completely different "sisterhood", I knew I had to read it.

This book is about three girls; Polly, Ama, and Jo. The story line takes place during the summer before their freshman year of high school. Like many friends, these girls have started going their separate ways. Ama is focused on nothing else but getting good grades. Jo thinks of nothing except fitting in with the "right" people. And Polly isn't sure exactly where she fits in. Unlike the other books, the girls aren't united by a pair of pants, but by three willow trees. 

This book was cute and definitely kept me reading. But the writing didn't leap off the page. The writing was just mediocre. I kept looking for more within her writing, and I just couldn't find it. I also didn't like how often she changes perspectives. She goes along on one story line and then switches to another. I think this book is a better fit for girls who like a light story line without much depth. But if you have a hard time reading and find yourself getting bored, then this book is probably for you. The writing is very clear and easy to understand. 

North of Beautiful

by Justina Chen Headley

To summmarize this book in one word, I would say that it's just beautiful. First off, the cover is amazing. And second, I love the name of the main character. Terra. Isn't that the coolest name? It's so unique, I love it. But this book is so much more than a pretty cover and a girl with a cool name. 

North of Beautiful is about a girl whose whole life has been characterized by the shame of a birthmark on her face. She spends hours each day applying makeup to cover up her noticable "flaw". She lives within a broken family and has a father who she can always count on to make her feel less than important. She has gone through countless procedures to create a face that might appear "beautiful". Like many teens, Terra is in a relationship only because she doesn't think anyone else would want her. This book is about relationships, ones that tear us apart and ones that hold us together. It's about the meaning of the word "beautiful" and how it means so many different things to different people. This book is such an inspiration to me. It made me want to travel, especially to China. It made me curious about geocatching. But more than anything, it made me want to live. The writing throughout the entire book was spectacular. I kept re reading sentences over and over again because the writing was so brilliant. It's the kind of book I want to write one day.

I was having such a hard time describing this book because I don't think I could ever do it justice. It's just phenomenal. Definitely one of the best books I've ever read! You will not be disappointed.

By Your Side

This is a song that really stood out to me when I heard it. I've been listening to it a lot lately because it mentions a lot of stuff that I've been struggling with. It also helps to remind me that no matter what uncertainties I'm facing, I'm not alone.

By Your Side

by: Tenth Avenue North

Why are you striving these days

Why are you trying to earn grace

Why are you crying

Let me lift up your face

Just don't turn away

Why are you looking for love

Why are you still searching

as if I'm not enough

To where will you go child

Tell me where will you run

To where will you run

And I'll be by your side

Wherever you fall

In the dead of night

Whenever you call

And please don't fight

These hands that are 

holding you

My hands are holding you

Look at these hands and my side

They swallowed the grave on that night

When I drank the world's sin

So I could carry you in

And give you life

I want to give you life

And I'll be by your side

Wherever you fall

In the dead of night

Whenever you call

And please don't fight

These hands that are 

holding you

My hands are holding you

Cause I, I love you

I want you to know

That I, I love you

I'll never let you go

And I'll be by your side

Wherever you fall

In the dead of night

Whenever you call

And please don't fight

These hands that are 

holding you

My hands are holding you

Upcoming Review: North of Beautiful

I spent a long time writing a review for North of Beautiful. This book is so spectacular and I wanted to make sure it received a proper review. I was getting ready to post it today, when it deleted. Really annoying. So hopefully I'll have another one coming soon!

Vast See

This is a picture that I was given a few years ago. It

has become special to me for many reasons. If you can't see it, the picture reads..

"The stairs led 

steeply downward 

into the vast 

see

within me that had yet to be 

discovered"

This picture also ties into another quote that I have come to love..

"The man who has everything figured out is probably a fool. College examinations notwithstanding, it takes a very smart fella' to say, 'I don't know the answer'"-Inherit The Wind

Picture by: Michele Renee

Pride & Prejudice: Facebook Edition

This is pretty hilarious. I'm not sure if it's just because I'm in the middle of blocking for this play, or if it's because I've read the book so much, or because I spend SO much time on facebook.

If you have some free time, have read P&P and would like a laugh, go here.

Books, Movies, & Mexico

1. I am super excited to find out that my favorite book, The Hunger Games, has a sequel coming out on September 8, 2009 called Catching Fire. That seems like such a long time to wait, but I am sure it will be worth it! Although, it seems that they are giving no information on the plot of the novel, especially after Stephenie Meyer's incident with Midnight Sun. I wonder if it's possible to get an ARC? That would be so amazing.

                                                                                                                           

2. Apparently there's also another book coming out in The Luxe series, called Envy. I have been trying to get into those books for a looong time. I've read about halfway through the first one, but I haven't read Rumors yet. I just don't seem to have enough time anymore for pleasure reading *sigh*. Anyways, the new book is set to come out on January 25.

3. The Twilight dvd is coming out on March 21st! Of course, I have already pre-ordered my copy and can't wait until it gets here. 

4. Pride & Prejudice rehearsals are going really well. Although, we have JUST started blocking so there's still a lot more work to go. I am actually enjoying my role as Mary Bennet. I am on stage most of the time, and I still have a decent amount of lines, but not an overwhealming amount like I had when I played Olivia in Twelfth Night. We have three teachers playing roles in the play and they have all been amazing, I can already tell that the play is going to be fantastic!

5. I found an old journal the other day, the one that I took with me when I went on a mission trip to Reynosa, Mexico in December, 2007. I am thinking I might post the journal entry's on here. It was quite a while ago, but the trip was such an experience that I would love to share. Thoughts?

P.S. I have become obsessed with Twitter. It's so much fun. It's basically like facebook statuses, but that's all it is. I know it sounds boring, and when I first heard about it I thought "wow, another thing like myspace and facebook that I dont need to get addicted too". It is so worth it though, I have a hard time trying not to update too many times in one hour. I think it would be so much fun to write a book all in twitter updates!

Snowed In!

Well, it actually happened. We have about 5 inches here and it's still snowing. For NC this is like a blizzard, NO JOKE! We never get any snow. School is actually closed too, which is fun! But, I'm feeling sick and have homework so I've been inside most of the day.

I also shocked myself and watched the presidential inaguration today. Regardless of how I feel about the new president, it is a very historical moment and I wanted to be a part of it. I will continue to pray for our country and our new leader.

Well, I'm off to watch the snow!

"I no longer live, but Christ lives in me"

I have been trying to find a way to put into words what I am feeling right now. The fact is, I simply can't do it. I am at a loss for words (and some of you know, that doesn't happen very often, heh) to describe how God has been working in my life this past week. I am just in awe of his ability to seize control of a situation and work everything out better than I could have possibly imagined.

This may not make a lot of sense, but here it goes:
Today is my sister's birthday. The same day that she was led to profess her faith in Christ in front of our church. The same day that she made the decision to get baptized. The same day that our friend learned forgiveness. The same day when I realized that NOTHING is impossible through God. Coincidence? I think not.

Pride & Prejudice

I don't have a lot of time to write (as usual) but I just wanted to let you know what part I got. I really wanted the part of Jane Bennet (basically my dream role), but unfortunately I did not get cast as Jane. But I did get cast as Mary Bennet, and for the first time I am in cast 1 (which is a VERY big deal). For the audition I had to go and sing badly, and apparently I have a talent for that because our director loved it and that's basically the whole reason that I got the role.

I'm so excited! :)